Ep75: 7 lessons from going back to our home country

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We’ve had a short break, as we both went back to the UK for 3 weeks.

We hadn’t seen some of our friends or family for 2 and half years, so although it was brilliant, we did learn 7 important lessons.

I think it underlined WHY we still want to live and work abroad.

Enjoy!

NOTE: This is following our new format of podcast episodes that are either about:

  • WHY you want to live & work abroad (this week)
  • HOW to live and work abroad (next week)
  • WHERE to live & work abroad (coming up!)

Let’s get stuck in. 

The roadmap we mention can guide you through the questions you need to ask before starting your own adventure.

Want to get involved? It’s completely free – just go to ASidewaysLife.com/roadmap.

As ever, get in touch on Instagram (@asidewayslife) or email asidewayslife@gmail.com. We genuinely would be thrilled to hear from you.

The Transcription

Note: This is autogenerated so may not be 100% accurate!

[00:00:00.190] – Leanne
Yeah. So, lighting the mood slightly, you missed the silly thing like curry. Hello and welcome back to a slide with live podcast, the Honest Guide to Living and Working Abroad.

[00:00:16.180] – Al
I’m Leanne and I’m al.

[00:00:20.550] – Leanne
Been away a little while.

[00:00:22.530] – Al
Quite a while, actually. Probably about six weeks. All in all.

[00:00:26.370] – Leanne
Shockingly. Our last episode was May 14.

[00:00:31.690] – Al
Yeah, that’s not good. That is about six weeks, isn’t it?

[00:00:34.400] – Leanne
A little bit longer, I think, but for good reason. We have been back in the UK, our home country, for the first time properly, like, since the Pandemic, since Christmas 2019 is a bit of fair, bit catching up to do. So I’m sure you’ll forgive us listeners for prioritising ourselves, our family, our friends, and just immersing ourselves back into what life used to be before the global shit show. That was over 19.

[00:01:02.350] – Al
Yeah. I don’t know whether you listen to the same, whether you’ve not been back to your home country because of this. I mean, we went back and I hadn’t seen Leon’s parents for two and a half years. You hadn’t seen mine for two and a half years. We couldn’t go back at Christmas because of what you said, omnichron or something. It was I think that’s a transformer. And so it was all a little bit weird. So we thought over a couple of gyms earlier this week, we thought maybe we should do an episode on what we think, or what the seven things we learnt about going back for the first time properly in about two and a half years.

[00:01:39.010] – Leanne
Yeah, just the things we learn about going back to our home country after so long. And I think the moments of reflection, realisation good stuff, bad stuff in the middle of stuff. Just stuff we learnt. Always good to reflect on things you learn, I think.

[00:01:56.620] – Al
Absolutely. So, going forward, back on a normal schedule, we have a lovely guest on next week I’ll tell you about shortly. Very interesting. A nomad mother or an expat mother? I’m not sure if that my mom’s called Pat. So if she lived abroad, would she be Expatpat?

[00:02:15.260] – Leanne
We’ve already spoken to expat pat on the podcast.

[00:02:17.860] – Al
That’s true. That’s true.

[00:02:19.790] – Leanne
She wouldn’t be the OG expat pat, and I can’t imagine that would sit well.

[00:02:25.850] – Al
No, it wouldn’t. If you remember Back to Christmas, I called her the Duchess at one point and I got such a bolicing for that. Apparently. Jimmy Savile, I think that most people around the world have heard of him, called his mother the Duchess. And so therefore, yes, it didn’t go down well. So we have to be careful how he refers to my mother. From now on, it shall not be the Dutchess nor expat Pat. Anyway, moving on. All right, so do you want to do this one by one? Like, you take one, I take two?

[00:02:55.800] – Leanne
Yeah, let’s do it.

[00:02:57.040] – Al
Okay. So do you want to crack on me number one or joint meeting.

[00:03:00.970] – Leanne
I will do number one. Yeah.

[00:03:03.860] – Al
Okay. So what was the first thing? Is it seven?

[00:03:07.700] – Leanne
We got seven, I think, yeah.

[00:03:10.070] – Al
Lovely. The first of seven of things that you learnt when you were back in.

[00:03:13.020] – Leanne
Your home country, goliath, my home country is the UK. And what I learned is it’s fucking expensive. I mean, now, we knew, of course, that we were able to live a certain level of quality of life on a lower budget, living in countries that we’ve lived in over the past few years, mainly in Europe, but also in Southeast Asia. And you get your little pockets of expense, for sure. But, my God, the UK is expensive. Just from the minute we got off the ferry, which is another second story, but the minute we got off the ferry, it was like everyone was just like it was like I turned into a contactless debit card and everything I walked past went, beep, beep, another 20 pound, another 30 pound, another £100. Honestly, I think, Maggie, I guess, context, first time we’ve been back for a long time, it was probably two and a half years of trips wrapped into one. It was missed Christmases, missed birthdays, missed everything. So we didn’t hold back. We had three weeks of a lot of fun. But we paid for that, my friend.

[00:04:28.430] – Al
Yes, we did. But it was silly little things that you just go and buy, like a bar of chocolate, for example, that maybe I’m miss remembering it, but I don’t remember it being like 80 pence for a dairy Milk or something.

[00:04:40.260] – Leanne
I don’t think it’s 80 pence. I think you’re looking like £1.50 or something. Cost of coffee. My God. Yeah, that’s definitely gone up, because I used to get a Costa, like, every other day going into work, and I couldn’t have afford that back then.

[00:04:53.380] – Al
That’s one thing in Europe which we’ve spent the predominant amount of our time in Europe, is that coffee. There’s a couple of cool things about coffee, mainly in Spain. The first part of it is, in Spain, you can sell alcohol without a licence. This is our understanding. Don’t go in a loft licence to double cheque that. But you can’t sell coffee without a licence. You need to have a licence to sell coffee. It’s a very serious situation. But not only but the second part of it is that coffee isn’t that expensive to buy in a coffee place. So there are rarely Starbucks or Costas in Europe, particularly Spain and Italy, because and Croatia, because why would they be? So you can go into a little bar, a tiny little bar that doesn’t look great from the outside. You’re going to have a coffee just as good as Starbucks, just as good as Costa, and it’s probably going to cost you about a euro to a euro. 20 for a coffee. Now, you compare that to what was flat white in was it £3, £3.

[00:05:48.050] – Leanne
Something yeah, that only last two sips.

[00:05:50.450] – Al
That’s about, what? Four and a half, $5 US dollars. Maybe about eight or nine Australian dollars. It was just incredibly expensive.

[00:06:00.950] – Leanne
It was. And of course, with the increases in fuel prices, it didn’t help our cause that we were bobbing from Manchester to Lincoln to North Wales to Scotland to Lincoln to North Wales again. So we spent a fair bit in fuel. Yeah, everything, really. Thank God we spent most of our time staying with family and friends because I think if we’d have added on, like, hotel airbnb onto that, it would be an eye watering amount. That would be we would have spent on that trip.

[00:06:31.210] – Al
It would be. Now, what’s interesting actually, about your airbnb thing is that if you as in you listener, I wish there was like a pronoun for listener is that if you have been away and you’re thinking of going back post pandemic to your home country, airbnbs are no longer the cheaper option because people are doing these vacations aren’t. That what’s called. So trying to get a two bed, we looked for a cottage somewhere in Manchester and the closest we could get was like, north of Bolton, and it was around about £3000 for the month or something, maybe 4000. It was extremely expensive compared to over here. Excuse me, we’re in Spain. For about £2000 you can get a two bedroom place. Not a one bedroom place, but it’s right by the sea. So that is something else to consider as well.

[00:07:29.670] – Leanne
Yeah. And I think it was a timely reminder for us that the cost of living is cheaper abroad. Although it is, of course, going up. It depends where you are. But comparatively, we can have a much better quality of life for our budget than we could in our home country. And I think that’s probably one of the main things or reasons that come up when people are starting to think about living and working abroad.

[00:07:57.100] – Al
Absolutely. Okay. So it was Peanut, by the way, just shaking his head. He wants to be on the podcast. So number two, the second thing, or the first thing I noticed is number two analyst was with true friends, you just sort of pick up where you left off because we haven’t seen friends for two. And most of our friends we haven’t seen for two and a half years because we just came back and saw our individual parents 18 months ago and then didn’t see anyone else for fear of catching the lurghy and giving them covet or something. She didn’t see anyone. But with True Friends, you just sort of just meet up and go, all right. And they go, Yeah, point. Yeah. Okay. Did you find that?

[00:08:39.260] – Leanne
Definitely. It was so lovely and reassuring as well. I’ll be honest, I was not nervous about seeing my friends again, but I was saying to you when we were waiting for one of our friends, I had, like, little butterflies. It’s like, is it going to be the same? Are we going to have things to talk about? Of course it is. And of course we do, because those French has been on years and years, so of course it is. So I guess that’s it. If you are feeling perhaps a little bit anxious, a little unsure about how your attention will be and what your friendship will be like, obviously we can’t speak for everybody, but for us, we felt those feelings too, and it was unnecessary. As you say, we picked up exactly where we left off.

[00:09:17.010] – Al
Absolutely true. Friends, they are champions for the life you’ve got. And if someone is talking shit about you behind your back, or has got snarky comments to make, etcetera, etcetera, about the life you’re living, they’re not really a friend. And you just kind of have to sadly say goodbye. Probably sooner rather than later.

[00:09:40.490] – Leanne
Yeah, sadly.

[00:09:43.190] – Al
Anyway, so that’s my number two.

[00:09:48.630] – Leanne
How was your number two?

[00:09:50.210] – Al
It was satisfying.

[00:09:51.390] – Leanne
Good.

[00:09:53.850] – Al
What about you? What have you got? What’s your next one?

[00:09:56.050] – Leanne
So, number three, and I think it’s maybe like an extension of number two, is I had a real, realisation moment, stood chatting to my friends and just thinking, my God, we sacrificed a lot for this life. So much. And I think we’ve sacrificed more, given the pandemic. Normally, we wouldn’t have gone that long without seeing friends. Normally, we would be going back for various reasons, and whether it be gigs or meetups or birthdays or celebrations. So I had to remind myself that the sacrifices we’ve all made over the last two and a half years are greater than we normally make. But just everything from realising what you miss out on, the times, the fun times that people have without you, whether that just be going for dinner or going to a gig, how much people go through and you’re not really there for them. You are because you’re chatting. But there are things that people won’t necessarily share over video calls, over the phone or understandably. They’ll reach out to people who are physically there. Just the life, the social life, the work opportunities as well. We sacrificed a lot for this life, and I think we’ve said this so many times before, and we look at our roadmap.

[00:11:20.620] – Leanne
Our first level why is always first, because if you don’t fully appreciate your why and what you’re gaining, because you are giving something up. If you’re not clear on what you’re gaining, man, it’s hard. Even when you are clear, it’s hard. Yes.

[00:11:37.940] – Al
And I think that if you want to add more things to your life, unless your life is pretty empty, then you’re going to have to take things away. And when you’re physically not going to be somewhere, then you’re going to miss out on nieces and nephews who are growing older, you’re going to miss out on family events, you’re going to miss out on spending time with your parents. If you’re a bit older like us, then you know these times are important. And so I think it’s really important that whoever’s going into this journey understands that there are sacrifices to be made and you do give up a lot to have this kind of life, definitely.

[00:12:20.900] – Leanne
And I think if you’ve gone through a summer experience recently, we’d love to hear from you in terms of perhaps steps you’ve made to make less sacrifices or what you’re doing to equal the balance a little bit. I know it’s certainly on my mind when I can get back to the UK or organise, meetups elsewhere. It’s something that I do not want to go another year, let alone two and a half years without being there, without true friends are true friends. You left it where you picked off. If you continue to invest in that relationship and I feel like I’ve made a lot of draws and I haven’t made a lot of deposits recently and I need to, for my own wellbeing and sense of self, to invest a little bit more in perhaps not sacrificing quite so much.

[00:13:13.290] – Al
That’s a really good point about the bank. I like that idea because time is linear, isn’t it? You can’t be in two places at once, so if you’re in one place you buy defining by physics, you cannot be in another. So if you are deciding you want to go and live in Vietnam for a month, then you’re necessarily going to miss the other stuff that’s happening back in your home country. And I think this idea of bank where you might deposit all these amazing memories, you have to also offset that against the memories that you’re missing out from. That makes sense. I really like the analogy of the bank. We might expand that later on, maybe. Okay, so shall I go on to number four?

[00:14:00.260]
Yeah.

[00:14:02.770] – Al
One of the things that we discovered was that even though despite the fact that you’re sacrificing a lot, despite the fact that it was quite expensive back in the UK, all these things almost confirmed that you have made the right choice. If you go back in month in year 1230f, living and working abroad, you’re probably going to have some kind of realisation that, oh my God, I’m missing out on so much. But I think that once you get past year three, then the rest of it just confirms that we’re making the right decision in this life. That actually we are just as happy, if not happier in other places and potentially happy to deal with just the two of us talking most of the day, not being able to speak the language brilliantly, all kinds of other experiences, et cetera, et cetera. What do you think?

[00:15:00.250] – Leanne
I think you’re right. I think if you are living this life, if you want to live this life, something that certainly helped us is having these moments of reflection and walking through them. And I’m not sure if you’ve ever heard of something called toxic positivity, when people can think, Oh, no, I’ve got a brilliant life, so don’t even spend time reflecting on the downsides or empathising with people who are missing you. And I think it’s really important to have a rounded view of the life that you’re living, where the gaps are, where the sacrifices are, where the right choices are, and talking yourselves through them. And we’ve had so many conversations last three weeks, like, did we make the wrong decision? Should we have stayed in Manchester? Should we have done this? Should we stayed in Spain once Brexit happened? We’d have residency here now. Our Spanish would be amazing. Oh, my God, could you imagine that? And it’s like, yes, but if you would have made different decisions, you would have had different experiences. And ultimately, the experiences that we’ve had, good and bad, we’ve loved. It’s shaped us, it’s helped us grow. For a risk of being a bit cheesy, but, yeah, ultimately it’s a balance.

[00:16:18.070] – Leanne
And on balance, it’s confirmed that we have made the right choice. We’ve not been able to make the right or good choices over the last two and a half years, because the Pandemic but on balance, we do have a really great life.

[00:16:34.770] – Al
You did ask us that, I think, because we just arrived in Spain about four weeks ago and we spent maybe five years in Spain building a life, and then Brexit happened and we kind of saw ours and we were like, no, we’ve had enough. And then we decided to visit every country in Europe before Brexit happened, and the Pandemic stopped us from seeing the last final, like, three or four of them. We did get around most of them, bearing in mind before that, we mainly been to France and Italy, and that was kind of like it. So we got really cool places like Montenegro and Albania, Lithuania, Estonia, really cool places like that. However, Leanne asked me this question. She said she said a couple of weeks ago, if we had stayed in Spain then, as you just said there, our language would be brilliant. Not brilliant, but it’d be much, much better than it is now, and we probably would have got residency. Would you have changed anything over the last four or five years to have the residency? And I don’t think I even thought about it. I was like, no, because we wouldn’t have had these amazing experiences, we wouldn’t have been able to talk about what it’s like to live in Belgrade Baylegrade, in Serbia.

[00:17:46.610] – Al
We wouldn’t know what St Vivica was, we wouldn’t know. We wouldn’t have tasted smoked fish on the spit in Lithuania. All these cool sort of experiences. So I think you’re right, like we said before, there’s going to be a trade off, but can you just finish off, conclude my thoughts there?

[00:18:09.050] – Leanne
But there’s going to be upside as well. And I think perhaps one of the biggest upsides that I’ve maybe experienced is because you’re not in the and you know what, it’s probably a combination of going from how old was moved abroad 28 to 37.

[00:18:29.070] – Al
Oh my God, you look great for that.

[00:18:31.640] – Leanne
Thanks. But going from your late twenty s to your late thirty s, you start to evaluate things differently. When you’re in your 20s, you’re chasing the dollar, you’re chasing the success, you’re trying to really estab yourself in your career. You’re getting swept away by people’s, new cars in houses and all these other things. And I think when you remove yourself from that situation for a period of time, it certainly helped me kind of detach myself, that phase. I was in my early in my late 20s, but then also as time goes on and I don’t know as well whether it may be speaking to other people who have made significant career change or life changes later on to facilitate this life. For me, at 35, I was like, well, I want to now prioritise this aspect of my career, so I’m going to do it. Would I have made that decision if I’d have been in the confines of the UK where it is just a different pace and priorities and quite rightly, because look at the cost of living crisis now, right? The people that are going to be okay, the people have worked their asses off our age are now in a comfortable position.

[00:19:36.370] – Leanne
So it’s not about right or wrong. I just think for again, reflecting on, okay, I missed out on this, but I have gained. This is a really healthy way to just help you just digest this crazy, crazy life.

[00:19:52.210] – Al
That’s a really good way of putting it. I think that my next point here. Are we ready to move on to the next 01:00 A.m.? I jumping the gun. Your point was that you confirm that sorry, I’m just looking at my notes here. We said this is confirmed, you made the right choice in lifestyle. My next point is kind of almost going to sound like it’s going to be the opposite of that because it makes you doubt whether you’ve made the right choice.

[00:20:22.520] – Leanne
I guess that’s what we actually just kind of unintentionally segregated into, wasn’t it? I wondered what would life look like? But then is that just a symptom of every life? I wonder what would have happened if I’d have stayed with them or got taken that job or moved here.

[00:20:44.830] – Al
Yes, I suppose you’re right. Is that not like a function of human life, a part of it that you will always regret? Because we talked about this time being a linear thing where you could only be one place at a time. So therefore you’re necessarily moving missing out every minute you spend doing something else, you’re missing out an infinite number of other things you could be doing. So does that mean that we are, as humans, we are ultimately going to be a little bit disappointed and melancholy? Well, maybe at this point, Leonard, I normally just pass a face.

[00:21:26.750] – Leanne
No, maybe I guess we do. It’s easier to see the negatives and situation, the whole fight flight argument, I guess from an evolutionary perspective. I don’t know. I don’t know, maybe it is just part of it. But I think as well, I think that one, if you’ve made the right decision, can often be fueled a lot by guilt. And again, probably quite rightly, because if you’re not present enough to actually understand the sacrifices you’re making and the impact your choices are having on other people I mean, think back to that episode of A Podmos where Pat Elliot’s mum was on the podcast and she reflected on how having expat children puts more pressure on the siblings to kind of be there because they’re physically there. So you do feel that element of guilt and you think, God, have we done the right thing? Are we putting too much pressure on our siblings to be there when things happen, good or bad? So I think that’s the issue with that is that there is always going to be a healthy dollop of guilt along with each of the decisions you make to have this life. But I think that’s it is a healthy dollar because if the danger is you start to veer into a very selfish place where you are making all of your decisions for you and perhaps not quite thinking about the broader, broader picture and broader circumstance.

[00:22:55.180] – Leanne
And I think that’s how I’m feeling right now. To be honest, I think I feel a bit guilty. I hope it’s from the pandemic and the situations that we were in, we were all in. But I do feel guilty that I have made a lot of selfish decisions over the last two and a half years.

[00:23:13.950] – Al
But I think we all have to make selfish decisions and I think the majority of people do make decisions that are selfish, it’s just that those which we can’t necessarily contribute to like a problem that someone on the ground can deal with and we can’t just emphasises that. But there’s probably they have lots of selfish decisions they’ve made. And I think by having these regrets shows, first of all, that you are thinking about them and secondly, by going back to your home country and thinking, have I made the right decision? I think it’s a very healthy way to look at things because you should always be questioning your life. Some of the most unhappy people we met as expats we first moved to Spain, were the ones who are saying, oh, my God, never going back. This is just a life for me. This is what I’m doing from now on. I can’t believe people don’t more people don’t do it. They’re all idiots living in the UK or the US or Australia or whatever it is, and they were ultimately the least happy and the most likely to go back to their home country.

[00:24:17.230] – Al
So I think that it’s very smart to question, first of all, question your decision from every angle. And second, if you do feel guilty, it shows that you actually feel, it shows that you are being empathetic. Is that the right word? Empathic?

[00:24:31.830] – Leanne
Yeah, I think you’re right. And also as well, this reflection can help us make different decisions in the future. Like we’ve always said, you make the best decisions that you can in the moment, you can with the resources that you have. And I think we’ve all experienced that to an extreme over the last couple of years, and now we’re finding ourselves in different circumstances with different resources. So we’re going to be able to make different decisions.

[00:24:58.410] – Al
Absolutely. So, is it your turn for number six?

[00:25:02.440] – Leanne
Yeah. So, lightning the mood slightly, you miss the silly things like curry. Oh, my God. Manchester is the outside of India. To be fair, the best place to get is it classes like South Asian curry, like India, Bangladesh type. It’s just so good. And you know what, the food in general in Manchester is outstanding.

[00:25:27.070] – Al
Really good.

[00:25:27.800] – Leanne
There are so many good foodie spots there now. That’s some of the best food I’ve had in a long, long time in that trip.

[00:25:35.550] – Al
Yeah, I think because we ate out probably about three quarters of the time.

[00:25:39.910] – Leanne
We were there, because that’s why it was expensive.

[00:25:43.170] – Al
Yeah, it was a 70 quid for lunch. How did that happen? Didn’t even have a glass of wine. But anyway, you’re right, the food is incredible. We have missed curry because it’s funny, if you move to a particular European country, then you’ll find the certain things you just can’t get. Like in Croatia, it’s almost impossible to find any kind of curry. And if you do find it, it tends to be the sort of tinned curry that your mother used to make and throw in a pan and put some rice on. We had the same in Spain. We went to this place in Spain that was pretty rubbish for curry, but all the legs were like, Oh, we got to go and get a curry. It’s going to be running. It’s like all came from the same pot.

[00:26:22.450] – Leanne
It’s just desperate time, isn’t it, when you’ve been there for that long? But, yeah, and I think the other thing that I kind of missed as well, which I never really thought about, I guess I haven’t thought about for a long time, is just the ease of communication interactions. Like, we stopped off of the ferry when we got off and we were probably somewhere just north of London. Went to a service station, went to get coffee sandwich from Ms. I think I had more like polite, positive, chitchat conversation that ten minutes than I had in like, two. And a half years, because you try when you’re in a different country, but let’s be honest, it’s more difficult, particularly in places where you’ve only spent a short period of time and where language is very difficult. But I came out walking on air, I was like, People are so friendly here, they’re so nice. And I’ll be honest, after four or five days, this, I was like, this is getting annoying. Why are people so friendly? Why are they asking me questions while I’m just trying to buy a cup of coffee? Sure, brilliant.

[00:27:24.970] – Al
I don’t know if it’s just Canadian and UK thing, I don’t know, but people seem to say, I know people said sorry a lot. I accidentally let a door slam on this guy’s face and he was carrying a cup of coffee or something and he just had to dodge to get out of this thing and held it with his shoulder and managed to avoid spreading his coffee. He looked up at me and he went, Sorry, mate. And I’m like, I’m just throwing this door in your face, why are you apologising to me? But, yeah, it accentuates or it just help remind you of this kind of strange little eccentricities of our nation that are pointed out by people from different nations.

[00:28:06.790] – Leanne
Yes. Like the level of customer service or interest, the level of apologising for doing anything right or wrong in the UK. Is there anything else that we noticed?

[00:28:22.150] – Al
I can’t think of anything. Well, no, I mean, there’s lots of little things. For example, I know this is not along the lines, what you’re just saying there, but while you’re thinking is like a pint of ale. You just don’t really get that. And I’m sorry, I know there’s going to be a lot of people out there going, you’re an idiot, Al, because you get plenty of good Alex y and Z, but English ale bitter, you just don’t in my opinion, you don’t get anywhere else as good as that. Like Speckled hen or something like that.

[00:28:58.790] – Leanne
Yeah, I agree. The level of convenience that we’ve talked about a lot, everything is done online. Yeah. It’s funny, I actually felt for the first time, a bit like I was the foreign one in the UK. It’s clearly my issue that it’s starting to annoy me how friendly people are. Yeah, it makes you wonder, doesn’t it?

[00:29:26.170] – Al
It does. So the last and 7th and final thing that we noticed going back to our home country was that virtual meetups zooms, quizzes, all that, palava. It’s nowhere near someone meeting up with someone and just sitting in front of them and hugging them and it’s just not it’s a good replacement, but it’s nowhere near replacement, is it?

[00:29:52.460] – Leanne
It’s a great replacement. It’s a replacement that I think kept us all going at some point. And certainly a replacement that helps us stay in touch with friends and family and feel like we’re still in the loop and still involved in some way. But, yeah, there is nothing like sitting on the sofa with your best mates on a Sunday morning after a hell of night out the night before with a cup of tea and saying nothing and just watching the telly and making the odd comment. And it’s just that, isn’t it? It’s just sitting with somebody and not saying anything, but you know they’re there. So then you can say some more. Catchment I guess it’s just a lot more informal, isn’t it? Can feel a bit forced, virtual communication sometimes.

[00:30:39.690] – Al
That’s a really good point, because in a normal conversation, you and I will be chatting and then it’ll probably be like a ten minute break where we think about things and we’ll come back to chatting. And you couldn’t really do that in zoom. You couldn’t really say, Yeah, very good, continue watching TV, because they like you there. Have you frozen? What’s going on? So I think that’s a really good point. Okay, so shall we just quickly recap those?

[00:31:05.420] – Leanne
Yes.

[00:31:06.020] – Al
Do you want to do our recap, Lia?

[00:31:07.790] – Leanne
Number one, fucking expense. You’ve actually written that in the notes as well. I’m not just kind of like I’ve actually written some suggestions. Number one, it’s fucking expensive.

[00:31:25.230] – Al
I like doing number two. Yeah, sorry, that’s what the silence was. See, this is why this two way medium just doesn’t work. Number two, with true friends, you just pick up where you left off when you do with real good friends, and that’s probably a really good gauge of whether you’ve got good friends or not.

[00:31:40.620] – Leanne
But when you do have good friends and family, you sacrifice a lot for this life. That’s what I’m saying. Number three. Sorry, you’re not just doing number two.

[00:31:49.540] – Al
Yes. Structurally, you should say number three is sorry.

[00:31:55.340] – Leanne
So sorry. Edit that out. Yeah, you won’t. Number three, we sacrifice a lot for.

[00:32:02.380] – Al
This life, we do. Number four, going back to home country can confirm that this life is the right choice.

[00:32:11.430] – Leanne
However, number 5345, you stop numbering and you number them to three. And then she said dashes. Number five, you also wonder if you’ve made the right decision. It can cause some significant periods of reflection.

[00:32:27.230] – Al
Really can. Number six, you miss silly things. I say silly things. But your home comforts, like curry.

[00:32:33.450] – Leanne
Good cup of tea.

[00:32:34.460] – Al
Good cup of tea. Warburton’s orange bread with bacon. We went to Denmark and the bacon, in my opinion, was nowhere near as good as the Danish bacon we get in the UK.

[00:32:46.980] – Leanne
Maybe we went to the wrong bit, or maybe the export. The Danish bacon to the UK is very popular.

[00:32:53.310] – Al
And number seven, virtual ketchup.

[00:32:57.110] – Leanne
Aren’T a good replacement for face to face long term. So if you’ve not been home for a while, get your ass on that bus, train, playing or automobile and go see someone. Go give them a hug.

[00:33:07.920] – Al
Definitely. Okay. You got any thoughts of yourself of your own. Go to your email, go at type in ass sidewayslife@gmail.com and let us know. You can also go onto instagram. You’ll be speaking to Leanne there because she’s the cool one. What’s her instagram name?

[00:33:23.060] – Leanne
A sidewayslife.

[00:33:24.220] – Al
A sidewayslife. In fact, we’re on all the socials at sideways life, so just search for a Sideways life podcast, and we’re pretty much dominating them. Page one of Google. Okay, so just before we go, I want to tell you about next week. We’re talking to a lovely lady called Julianne who written a book called how her mother took her first step on the moon and mother’s keepsake journal of advice to my children. A long title, but a great book. And I’ll be talking to her all about her expat life and lots of other things like practical advice on how to help parents teach life skills to their own children and how she’s managed to be a mom, CEO and an expat wife. Fun fact, she’s from America. So I’ll be saying mom, and she’ll be saying mom, no. How did you say mom?

[00:34:07.220] – Leanne
M-O-M. Yeah. Well, there you have it. Well, I’m looking forward to that and hopefully some good insight stories and tips for those listeners who do have children. And we simply can’t help you there. But we can find you people who.

[00:34:20.750] – Al
Can, and we have. So look out for that for next episode. In the meantime, it’s goodbye from now.

[00:34:26.070] – Leanne
It’s goodbye from Leon.

[00:34:27.370] – Al
Bye, you.

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