Ep76: Meet Julianne, an ex-pat mother who has written a book

//
Podcast badges
Find the Podcast

In this episode, we meet Julianne Bosch (pronounced ‘Bosk') who has travelled the world as a wife (to a fancy jet-setting, Spanish-speaking businessman) and mother (to 3 cool kids who speak loads of languages).

Regular listeners will know that we don't have (nor do we want!) kids, so we always jump at the chance of sharing travel stories from people who do. 

You can find out more about Julianne on her website, and you can buy her book from her website, or Amazon.

Hope you enjoy this one!

NOTE: This is following our new format of podcast episodes that are either about:

  • WHY you want to live & work abroad
  • HOW to live and work abroad
  • WHERE to live & work abroad

Let's get stuck in. 

The roadmap we mention can guide you through the questions you need to ask before starting your own adventure.

Want to get involved? It's completely free – just go to ASidewaysLife.com/roadmap.

As ever, get in touch on Instagram (@asidewayslife) or email asidewayslife@gmail.com. We genuinely would be thrilled to hear from you.

The Transcription

Note: This is autogenerated so may not be 100% accurate!

Leanne
You can't put that out of context! It sounds so rude!.

Al
Hello and welcome to Episode. Are we on 76? Leanne? We are 76 of a Sideways Life podcast. If you are brand new to this, then hello, welcome. You've obviously seen in the title of this and it's resonated in some way with you. So that is good news because the title basically describes who we're talking to this week, which is a lovely lady called Julianne Bosch.

Leanne
It's a solid name.

Al
It's a solid name. Well, her husband is Catalan, I think originally her family is from Catalan in Spain. North east never Eat, northeast northeastern Spain. Catalan is very different language to Spanish, to mainland Spanish, which I think is called Castillon Castill.

Leanne
Yeah, sure, yeah.

Al
I should have done a bit research.

Leanne
Many questions you've not prepped for us.

Al
But it's quite a long interview today, so we're just going to give you what we're looking forward to hearing. So, Leah, what are you looking forward to hearing about?

Leanne
I am looking forward to hearing about what Julianne says about being a guest as an expert, as a nomad. Even if you're just on holiday, you are a guest in somebody's country and there is a level of respect and I'm looking forward to hearing what she again says about that.

Al
Feed off the sofas. I'm looking forward to learning why you should always take a sandwich in your bag when you go for dinner in Tokyo.

Leanne
Well, I mean, to be fair, anything from plastic juice is that one should always carry a sandwich. The Queen has a marble sandwich in a hamburg. If you haven't seen that, if you have no idea what I'm talking about, the phone, if you're probably not from the UK, I think anyone from the UK at this point will know about it. If you're not YouTube Platinum Jubilee Queen and Paddington Bear, it is genuinely some of the most brilliant, heartwarming TV I've ever seen. Go. Now we'll wait.

Al
The final thing I'm interested in is finding out why cleaning your own step, your front step, is going to clean the world. Anything else to add before we jump into the interview?

Leanne
No.

Al
So I'm really excited to have on our podcast Julianne Bosque, who is currently in Florida, but she's lived in, I think 13, will ask her in a second. 13 different countries in 28 years. She's also written a great book all about her memoirs to her children, which is called how a Mother Took Her First Step on The Moon and Mother's Keepsake Journal of Advice to My Children. So I'm really excited to invite to welcome Julianne Bosk.

Julianne
Thank you so much for having me.

Al
Thank you. We're a very different time zones here. You're like five in the morning. Are you?

Al
At the moment, I am, and I love it. It's quiet and peaceful here and I get great morning sunrise.

Al
Oh, wow. It looks beautiful. We are absolutely beautiful.

Julianne
Thank you.

Al
So can you just introduce yourself in, say, 90 seconds and give our listeners the potted history of Julianne.

Julianne
My name is Julian Bosk, and I was an expat mother. And I'm just going to correct you a little bit. I moved to four continents, 13 times. I've moved because some of them I've moved within that country, but it could be a different city. But I actively participated in my children's life. I was working while abroad doing parenting jobs, yet kind of trying to recreate myself. I landed here in Florida, in the United States, and became a life and career coach. And in that self awareness, I was exposed to a cousin who was diagnosed with anaplastic thyroid cancer. And she shook up my world a little bit. I thought that I was doing a lot of self awareness, but I was turning 50, dreading it. And she said, I'm hoping to live to my next birthday. Cherish it. What are you going to do about it? And so I decided to say yes to everything that is this decade of 50. And the first thing I did was if something was to happen to me, I wanted to have documented in the Library of Congress stories that I thought were important to my children, but yet could help and be intentional for other mothers that are possibly starting their family or in the middle of it, or in the grey areas of life.

Julianne
And I needed a little bit of answers. And so I don't want people to say, this is the rule. I want them to read a little of my short story, listen to my advice. And the great part about my book that I wrote was there's journal section. And I want you to be intentional, write down what is important to you and create memories.

Al
Brilliant. And so you said you said yes to everything. So what's one of the craziest things you said yes to this decade, this year?

Julianne
Well, one that was on my husband's list that I had to say yes to was jumping out of an aeroplane with my children and him. And it's very daunting to see your poor child go over the edge of the aeroplane before you, hoping that we all make it to the ground. So I did say yes to skydiving, which I hate heights, but I said yes. I did it.

Al
Good for you. And just so we get some context, what age are your children at the moment?

Julianne
I have twins, a boy and girl, and they are mid twenty, s. And then I have a daughter who is young, 20s, let me put it that way.

Al
Lovely. And so was it your choice to move so many times as you did?

Julianne
I met my husband. My husband is from first generation American, but he was originally from Barcelona, Spain. He had parents that were their whole family in Barcelona. And then during the Franco dictatorship, their parents moved to Mexico. And so we met in graduate school, in a very unique graduate school called Thunderbird at the time, and I was always enamoured with Spain. And we clicked on the first day of school. Three months later, he proposed. We got married within the year and boom, we were off. I knew my life would be international because of where I was and what I wanted in my life. Did I know I was going to be moving this much and have my closets clean? Absolutely not. I would say it was not really my choice sometimes, but his opportunities were larger and greater financially. So I said, Why not? Why not have somebody let you explore the world? A company needs you for exposition. And it was an opportunity to learn, basically in countries all over the world.

Al
That's really cool. And so just to give our listeners a bit of context, in terms of what sort of work does your husband do that takes him around the world?

Julianne
My husband is involved in a direct sales company that I can give you a little hint that it burped things and they're all over the world. That little plastic container is all over the world. And that was the company that opened our eyes to business units in Asia, in India, in Europe. It was quite practical in everyone's home all over the world. And then with that, he changed companies down the road and so we got other exposures to other companies and other countries, but that's what started it.

Al
Very cool. So take us through very briefly, chronologically. Did you leave straight away after you got married? When did you leave and where did you go first? And then up to now, give us your timeline.

Julianne
The first couple of moves were in the United States, but I will say Europe is very unique. You have different countries. Well, I did not realise that about the United States. The state of Arizona is very different from the state of Texas is the state of New England, so you have different dialects, just like in Europe or in Asia. So that was a learning curve at the beginning, but then kind of nine months in, we were given an opportunity to move to Mexico and I said, Let's go, let's do it. So I worked for the state of Arizona and he worked for this big company and I had to figure out how to drive to work and I had to figure out how to.

Pay.

Julianne
The electric bill and do those type of things. Having limited Spanish at the time, now I am fully immersed because my husband spoke Spanish and I thought, Oh, this is going to be easy, but I don't like people talking for me. And so I really had to learn Spanish so that I could get my words out, because I have a lot of them, obviously.

Al
Did you say you've been to mainland Spain or the Iberian Peninsula?

Julianne
I have, I have, because that's where.

Al
We spent like the first five years of our journey, was living down near Malaga in the hills. How did you see the differences between Mexico and mainland Spain? Obviously, very similar language but different dialect. But what other differences did you see?

Julianne
Definitely I'm a big foodie and so food, for example, tortilla patata in Spain is eggs and potatoes. A tortilla in Mexico is a flour disc. So you could be talking about one thing and they are talking about another. In Spain, you use more of the bosotros and more common practical of, I don't know, the way you present yourself in Mexico. It's like talking to your best friend next to you, yet with respect. And so I had to adapt a little bit of our vocabulary, I had to adapt the way we were eating food, I had to present myself differently. Some of the words in Mexico of the Spanish Spain dialect are come across this harsh. So you had to learn that and read a room and be very conducive of body language. And that is what held me very much. So in all parts of the world, is just being able to engage and communicate with people because they are pleasant and lovely to tell you what you're doing wrong, and I love it, it's constructive feedback, not like that's exactly wrong, but the way you say a word or the way you express yourself is a little different here in this country.

Julianne
So I learned very quickly in very uncomfortable situations.

Al
I think you've hit on what we discovered are the two key things for learning another language is one, you are going to get yourself in a comfortable situation. It's quite often quite comedic. I remember saying wishing someone happy birthday in Spanish and actually calling them a prostitute by mistake. Yeah, because that was the colloquial at the time. And the second thing is just not to try and be perfectly. You've said, I know that obviously you sound like your Spanish is fabulous, but a lot of people seem to think I need to say this perfectly and people will help you if you try, wouldn't they?

Julianne
Yes, very much so. And I found I always preface my conversations like, I am new here, tell me what you know, tell me what I should know. And also I'm practising my Spanish, will you help me? And surprisingly, the whole conversation flips around when you are open to learning from somebody, they want to share their culture, they want to share their food, they want to share the beauty of their country. And if you can continually be that learner in their country because you are a guest, you get magic. I think that's the greatest gift travelling does for you and your children and your family.

Al
It's a nice segue then. So you talk about the greatest gift. What other highs have you experienced? What's been some of the most amazing experiences you've had on your journey?

Julianne
Not only seeing this world, it makes you appreciate the things you have and you don't have. But some of my very closest friends are from around the world. And if I needed to go into battle, I know that I can pick one woman or man from some far remote area and they would be a part of my team because we all had survival tactics. You needed them and they trusted you when you're abroad and you're alone. And I think that is saying something that we think that we're isolated in a one area of the world. We're all part of this Earth. So that is comforting to me. That is a highlight to me because I still call on my friends from South Africa or I call on my friends from Japan. And honestly, I wrote this book, how a Mother Took Her First Step on the Moon. And it propelled me quickly to finish it because now I'm working on the second book, which is How She Took Her First Step on the Moon out during the holidays. And I interviewed every woman and some men around the world and they helped me quickly write book too.

Julianne
And I am going into battle and presenting something into the world that I think adds value.

Al
That's really cool. That sounds like the Mark Victor Hanson Chicken Soup for the Soul kind of thing where you're collecting stories.

Julianne
I hope so. That is a huge compliment. I hope so.

Al
That's fantastic. So when you say this virtual army or team, are they predominantly experts themselves?

Julianne
No, I would say I have a lot of local friends as well. I talk, as you know, too many people. I was sitting on a train in Japan and I was going from one spot to another and I turned and I looked and there was a mother Japanese, her name was Nobu, who is dearing to my heart. And I looked at her son and somehow with all the rhythms of the train, she perfectly turned his ice cream every time when it was about to drip. And it made me laugh hysterically. And I turned and I said, you don't know me. I am enamoured at how you juggle that on a train. And I have three kids of my own learning the train system there in Tokyo, Japan. I said, if you ever would like to practise English and this is my broken Japanese, or have a coffee, I would love to take you for one. She is one of my best friends. I still talk to her quite a bit. We exchanged messages on social media. The world is smaller now. My father used to travel abroad and he couldn't connect with people as easily.

Julianne
And he'd have to write a letter and then three months later, or three weeks later, it would arrive for them. And then three weeks later you'd get a letter back. Well, it's instantaneous now, so why not cultivate those relationships and especially with covet. It made you stop. And I checked in on all of these people. I'm like, how are you doing? What's happening there? What are the politics? What is the government happening? And it made me feel safer. It made me realise that this is a global pandemic and we're all working through it in different ways. But it settled me. It gave me more grounding and put my feet on the ground because my friends are all over the world going through the same thing I am.

Al
So you said, obviously, you've collected an amazing number of friends and acquaintances around the world for someone who's thinking about doing a similar thing, maybe in exactly the same situation where their spouse or partner is going to work abroad and you're coming along for the ride, what other things can they look forward to?

Julianne
If you keep a curious mindset, I have always been given more than I've put into that country. I'll give you an example, and again, it's Japan. But my husband's office would teach us things and help us culturally, because Japan is very different from the United States, yet the people are so kind and so loving and generous, and a sign of respect is about in Japan. And as we were leaving, every member of my husband's office came out. Our family was in a little minivan getting ready to go to the airport and every single one of them bowed and I'm bawling tears as we leave. And the fact that they gave me more by showing me a food or showing me an area of Tokyo or helping me when I didn't understand the translation, yeah, they are bowing to me with respect. I wish I could bow lower. They are a beautiful mankind. So I have been given those type of gifts. It's a gesture, it's a card, it's a small gift. In Mexico, you give 100%, stay curious, ask questions, excuse yourself, but you will receive far more than what you are expecting out of that country.

Al
100% agree. I think that people are generally basically decent, but there are some cultures, for example, the former Yugoslavia for us, where people just can't do enough for you. And there are stories about some English people who went camping in the rain at the bottom of someone's garden. It wasn't in their garden, it was a national park. But our friend went out and said, do you want to come in and stay in our house and have something to eat? And of course, then being British were like, who the hell are you? You could train to, like, hurt or something. But you're right. You just open yourself up and great things happen.

Julianne
They're easy. And keep that curiosity because it's not your norm and you are a guest there, so keep that in mind is you're a guest. If somebody came into your house and they messed up your couch and threw their feet all over your sofa, you would be upset. You would be like, Hey, you're a guest to my house. Treat that when you go into a country, is with respect and honour that they invited you into their home, and their home being their country.

Al
Absolutely. Now, you come across as generally a very, very positive person. So you might find the next question tough. But what are the downsides? In fact, there's two parts of this question. What are the general downsides of living in a different country, perhaps as an expat wife, perhaps just on your own? And the second thing I was going to ask you is, what regrets do you have?

Julianne
Okay, to answer the first question, I would say yes. Living abroad, you're going to have an ebb and flow. I remember we moved to Japan right after the tsunami, and there were not many Western gaijin, as they call them in Japan, being foreigner.

Al
Right, okay.

Julianne
And I remember being very lonely. My husband went off to work, my children went off to school, and I'm supposed to solve the problems of the household and get set up. And I'm on the Metro and I look out into the distance and it's a sea of blackheads and I am a giant. I have brown hair, but I don't have black hair. And it was a lonely feeling, like, I'm the only one here that does not look the same. I'm different. And it was a very lonely feeling to say, I have no one else that looks like me. I would say practically that whole experience, you're going to ebb and flow, you're going to be lonely, you're going to hate talking the language, your brain is going to fog over, you are going to hate the food. I was always hungry when I went to certain places, because America is an abundance. We have these massive plates and then you go somewhere and it's like this tiny thing. So pack a sandwich in your bag, get ready, you're on a ride. So I would say it's an ebb and flow. You just have to realise that it's not always going to be daisies and roses, but you have to keep your eyes open for the beauty, as I said before, repeat the second question for me.

Julianne
I want to answer that a little bit better.

Al
So, looking back, do you have any regrets?

Julianne
Yes, I do. I wish I would have jumped in much more to learn languages. Excuse my language. I half arsed, half past learning all the different languages. I wish I had pushed it a little bit more. I wish I had made little flashcards, but I have a little add. I don't like to be at home and looking at books and studying. I wish I had forced myself to go sit in a coffee shop and write cable, coffee cup, whatever, and then gone and talked to the barista and said, is this correct? How you ask us for a coffee or that is my biggest regret because now I see my children who have benefited from actually learning the language and getting out there they're utilising it in their life tenfold and I'm like I could have had five languages somewhat if I had kind of pushed it a little bit more and I can honestly say I speak Spanish but I could have spoken five other languages if I had just applied myself.

Al
So would you say you were naturally quite interested and good at languages?

Julianne
No, not at all. I will tell you my husband at the time, his grandmother so my kids great grandmother was not able to speak in English. I went to a dinner that she prepared for me. My husband translated to her that I thought her food was horrible and awful and he was playing a joke on his grandmother and she looked at me like wow, this lady's kojones drag on the ground is basically their translation and I'm smiling and she thought that I was just full of it. And later I come to find out what my husband had done to me. We were engaged at the time I believe. I was furious. So that being said, I said no one will ever use my words, I will be able to get by. So that's kind of how I've approached languages I get by. Spanish is one I forced myself I actually dug into just because of his family. I did not want to have him translating again for me because he does not do a good job and his grandmother is probably my biggest hero and mentor so I was privileged when I took the time to speak to her.

Julianne
But don't let other people talk for you. Learn the basics, it will serve you well.

Al
Any kind of apps or software or anything that might help people in your situation who aren't natural linguistics, whatever the word language people, anything you can advice you can get around that.

Julianne
I use Duolingo. However, I will say the best part of learning a language is just get out there, make mistakes, carry your little dictionary, flip through and write basic sentence like hi, my name is Julianne and I like to memorise those things and then start and then put yourself in situations to learn new vocabulary a coffee shop, a museum, wherever that you are on the train or metro put yourself in situations so you start learning vocabulary because if you can't use it, no app is going to help you learn a language.

Al
That's a really good point. I think there's a guy called Tim Ferris, I'm sure you know who he is but if people are listening haven't heard of me wrote the four hour workweek about probably about 20 years ago now and his idea was that he was going to work for 4 hours and travel and experience life the rest of the time. Whatever happened about that? I don't know. I don't think it was strictly exactly 4 hours. But one thing he did say, which is cool, he said that it will take you immersion, it will take you six months to learn 80% of any language if you just immerse yourself, but it'll take you another 20 years to get up to 96% is good. And I think that what you're saying there is brilliant. Because you're saying, just forgive yourself, allow yourself to be 60% good in a language and then don't put pressure on yourself to say everything perfectly, to learn every single word. I really like that's. Really cool.

Julianne
Yeah. And actually ask those that are in that country to correct you be open to be corrected. Because I have learned more about the nuance of a word, because somebody took the time to help me understand it. And I use it correctly now, because they told me, and like I said, it's a lady in the frame shop when I was trying to get frames hung in my house. She taught me the nuances, the difference of what this screw meant, this screw, and how I'm screwing. And so I say that with respect to learning language, because linguistics in itself, there's all these little nuances to it. And so just enjoy that and realise you're never going to be 100%. You didn't wake up with that word put in your mouth by your parents. So accept it and just say, Teach me, teach me and let me learn. And it will serve you well.

Al
Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. So tell me a little bit about your children's opinion. Did they live their entire life abroad?

Julianne
Yes, actually. My twins, I have a boy and girl twins, they were born in Mexico, so most of their life has been spent away from the United States. So I think we had a harder time when we moved back to the United States. But they wanted university degrees in the United States, and so they had their last year of high school in the United States. And it was like foreigners in our homeland, they would come home from a football game and be like, Oh, my gosh, mom, it's like TV. It's crazy. The cheerleaders and the explosions of they have these things that explode colour and the big jocks that were playing football, I mean, it was just not something that was our children's norm. So we had to re adapt to the United States because we came for the summers and it was always glorious to see grandparents and aunts and uncles and cousins, but we hadn't really experienced it. And it's what I grew up with, but my kids haven't. And so when they applied to universities, they had to adapt. And all three, ironically, ended up in Los Angeles, because their two main stays were Asia and Latin America, which is Mexican, Spanish speaking and also Japanese from Tokyo.

Julianne
And those were the two kind of real formative years for them. And Los Angeles had both of those. So my kids weren't at McDonald's and those places that maybe typical American children might encounter. My kids were going into Little Tokyo, and I would get receipts, like, mom, can you pay half of my grocery bill from Unighettis? And things that were different yet then my daughter would, like, head over and have local conversations with and things that the Spanish community within Los Angeles would provide. So they found ways to incorporate how they grew up back in the United States. But it was a little adapted. So people were like, Why do you eat that? My children don't drink soda. They drink green tea, which is in a bottle, and that is like a refreshing soda or a treat. Well, their friends drink it and like, Oh, that's gross. So they had a little bit of adaption to come back. But again, I have two daughters in New York and one in Chicago. They love the big cities. I don't know how they would do in Iowa or Wyoming, but yet my daughter spent the summer right now in Bordeaux.

Julianne
She wanted the countryside. She wanted to calm, drinking wine and enjoying food. So they figured out how to incorporate what they've learned being young, but then bringing it into their world and saying, Okay, I need a pause, or Yes, I need the crazy of New York, or enjoying where they're at. I think that's the biggest lesson that we've got from it, is just enjoy where you're at and then adapt. Adapt to what you need.

Al
I'm curious, what kind of accent do they have? Then.

Julianne
We have I would say we have American English accents. Spanish sounds like Spain. Because I forced my husband's parents that they could only speak Spanish, yet that was their third language. They spoke Katzalan, then English and then Spanish, because being for Barcelona, they were quite proud of Katzalan language. But I asked my in laws, please develop your relationship in Spanish, because they understand kotlin. But I wanted my children to know how to speak Spanish. And so it was very hard on my motherinlaw, but she did it for me, the love for me. And so they have kind of an accent of Spain, yet meshed in Mexican word. So we joke here in the United States, it's called Spanglish. Like, you enter English words with Spanish. I think all of our vocabulary is a mix, a mescla of everything that we speak. So they don't really have an accent. It's stronger in one area than the other of their grandparents influence or a teacher's influence. But I don't think we have it's a mess is what I'm trying to tell you. We have a lot of words we've adopted. Like, my Australian friend always says, lovely, and I think that's a great way of describing things.

Julianne
So I always say, Oh, isn't that lovely? And my friends here in America are like, what? We don't use that. Or my friends in Dublin what's the crack? What's up? And I use that sometimes and my American friends are like, what are you talking about? So I mix everything.

Al
I think I love that and that's a great conversation starter, but if you're on a first date and you're mixing up, that's just a cool. I think anyone who's lived in different countries, multiple different countries, particularly as a child, I didn't I wish I had, would have just been I think you've just got this totally different outlook on the world and people, as opposed to being I'm not saying the people who stay in one place are insular, but there is a tendency towards sort of just the more parochial views on life, whereas living somewhere else, you just get to see everything. I think that's really cool.

Yeah.

Julianne
I think it's a testament when you see what happens to your children. My children came back to the United States and they are far greater and achieved far more than I do because they know the gifts that they are given. My daughter, I have fears, I have worries. My daughter, obviously she's mid 20s, but she does not. And she jumps into a neighbourhood in La and she mentors 19 Hispanic girls that she hopes to be first generation Americans that get a college degree. She reads their college apps. She is a part of their life. And when they have struggles I have this example. One of the girls got her mentor cycle and her parents were absent. They were not there because in South La, they're working hard and they're trying to just make every day and they would call my daughter and my daughter would say, okay, this is what you need to do and to have compassion. I think travelling the world makes you realise we have a lot of gifts, we are very fortunate. Give back volunteer, help the next person, drag them up. Because I love this saying in Japan, my neighbour said, if you clean your front doorstep, the whole world would be clean.

Julianne
So start in your own neighbourhood, start doing activities in your neighbourhood that do good and create more. Because I think if you travel, if you see when you go home, how easy it is for you and how difficult it is for others when you're abroad. India is shocking in my head, yet there's so much joy and they're beautiful smiles when they're talking to you and explaining dishes to you and showing you the beauty of their country. Yes, there may be dirt and poverty, yet they're happy. And I want a little bit of that. A friend of mine taught me this is I take the good of what I want to remember and I come back and I say, Oh, today I want to be a little bit more like I'm in the country of India. I don't like where I am and I don't like what's happening, but I'm going to smile, I'm going to enjoy it. So adopt when you travel, adopt the greatest parts of the country and bring it home.

Al
I love that. So you wrote the book for your children?

Julianne
I did.

Al
I'm sorry. Before we go into that, I want to find out how you found the time because it sounds like you're a very busy person. So how did you find the time to write a book?

Julianne
Well, I wrote this book in two months, so I will say it came very quickly. I think when you love what you do, it's easy. Over the course of 18 years, I wrote things called scratch notes because I have a horrible memory and I didn't want to forget things. So I would write them in a journal or I'd write them in my computer. I'd write little things that happened to us, our family and good, bad, indifferent, I would just write them down. So I never knew what I was going to do with them. And I called them scratch notes. And when the opportunity came to me, my 50th birthday was coming and I said, I want to do this yes year and I want to make it the best decade ever. I don't want to succumb to the negative part of ageing. I want to say, hey, I've been given a gift of ageing. So I pulled all those scratch notes together and the first part is a story about what happened to me living all over these countries. And then it gives you a piece of advice and then my new occupation. I am a life and career coach and I counsel high executives to young professionals and we work together.

Julianne
I hold an accountability piece, which is a lot of journaling, a lot of selfawareness. A lot of selfreflection. So the third piece of the book, which is a journal, is to journal. And I ask you a question that provokes thought. And I just want you to keep writing down what's important to you. So other mothers can use this, whether they're a new mother, a mother in the chaos, or a grandparents, they can write down what's important to them. So I ask a powerful question to provoke thought in the book.

Al
I love that. So let me ask you then, so if someone's listening now, I never mind that I'm curious what would your sort of perfect target audience be feeling or thinking now that you knew your book would be able to help with?

Julianne
They are wanting to chart the course for their family or their child. They want to parent with intention. Just like when I coach people is they want to change. They want to pivot and make something different, change their outcome. So as a parent, sometimes we aren't given tools. If somebody had given me my book when I was starting out with my twins or my young child, it would help me to put together a plan. When you go on a trip, you don't just show up, you have to buy a ticket. You look at where the transit is, you think, oh, this is the airbnb or the hotel I want, or this is the food or the areas that I want to go visit. You don't just go there, Willie Nelly. Sometimes you research. So I'm asking parents to take a moment, stop, write down what is important to them, be intentional in your parenting and I think it will serve you well because your children will know your roadmap a little bit. It's not just willy nilly. You didn't just get off the aeroplane and say, here I am. You're like, I'm a parent. I have been given this opportunity to put another great soul into the earth.

Al
Fabulous. Fabulous. So before we wrap things up, do you want to tell everyone where they can find your book and then remind them what it's called?

Julianne
My book is called how a Mother Took Her First Step On The Moon. Mother's Keepsake Journal of Advice to My Children. And you can get it at www.julianbosque.com, which is Juliannebosch.com, or you can go and get it on Amazon. It is all over the world because my lovely friends all over the world have been purchasing the book. So I hope that your listeners will also do that.

Al
Yes, definitely. We'll put a link in the show notes and also a link to your website so you can learn more about Julianne and what and the coaching she does. Julianne, you've been so incredible. This has just been incredible. I've loved it. So thank you so much for your time and maybe catch up in a couple of years when you're doing your second book.

Julianne
I would love that. I would definitely love that. And if I am in Europe, I will pop in and say, hey, let's go for a coffee. Teach me what you know.

Al
Definitely.

Al
Well, what do you think about Julianne?

Leanne
She's awesome. What a woman, what a perspective, what amazing positivity. What a life.

Al
I know, it's pretty. And we said before we hit record, asked her like, can I ask you this question? Can I ask you that question? And she's like, Yeah, of course, ask me anything you want. And so she's a really cool lady. We've got a link to her book down below so you can find out how to get it. Her second one might even be almost ready by now because this interview is a couple of weeks old now and she works fast, doesn't she? So what would you say was your takeaways from our interview today?

Leanne
I think the one I absolutely loved. I mean, we said this before, we don't have children. When it comes to living and working abroad with children, we can offer very limited advice. And what I love about when we speak to expats who have brought up a family whilst living and working abroad, they just have such brilliant insights. And one thing that Julianne said is that intentional parenting, as I said, don't have kids, know a little about them, have a little interest in getting to know him. But as a psychology student, 18, walking into my first lecture in developmental psychology, the lecturer sat down and was like, right, ladies and gentlemen, the first thing you should know about developmental psychology is every parent looks at their children. What we're talking about here is damage, limitations. And from that moment I was like, I don't think I was interested in developmental psychology, but I mean but I think what was so brilliant about what Julian said was it I think we speak to parents who are thinking about living and working abroad and they have these understandable anxieties about what does that mean for their children, what kind of life they can have, how my decision is going to impact them positively or negatively.

Leanne
I think what Gina said so brilliantly was almost removed, all of that, and we're just talking about intentional parenting. What line for you carving for your kids, what opportunities are going to have, how are they going to apply that to the later life levels of adaptability, the language skills they'll have, the ability to dip into different communities because they are so adapted and have us exposed to the world. What an amazing thing to give your children if you do it with intent. I have no doubt that the life Judy has children and her husband have is not accidental. Well, it's not because she said she parented with intent. I think if you are anxious about that, you're not sure how it's going to work. I think there are some starter great advice from Julienne, I'm sure, in her book. And if you wanted to book a coaching session with her as well would be so valuable. It just changed everything for me. And I don't have kids.

Al
We have a dog who's basically our child.

Leanne
Look at the opportunities he's had.

Al
Exactly been to almost every country in Europe. So I think that finally the thing that I really like from this, and it's a recurring theme for me, I think is just be forgiving yourself for being wrong, particularly when you're speaking a language. Julianne talks a little bit about culture where there are different words in Mexican but also different kind of meanings to things. And so I think just forgive yourself. So if you are going to live and work abroad, you're going to get things wrong. You're going to make an ass of yourself. I remember saying to this guy from Argentina argentina. I remember saying to him, oh, let's make a deal. And I think I used the word trator rather than chatto. And he said, no, trata is either a sex party or some kind of weird orgy.

Leanne
That's exactly what I meant.

Al
That wasn't what I meant. But I think the point is that just allow yourself to get it wrong. Allow yourself to get it wrong.

Leanne
Absolutely. And I think the final thing that I really loved about Juliana really resonated with me what she's saying about ebb and flow. And I think it might maybe resonate a bit based on our last episode and some of the things that we were talking about in terms of returning to our home country. If you haven't listened again, you rebel. Go back to the start. It might take you a while to get to episode 75 if you haven't got the patience. Just bought back one. But yeah, it's just that ebb and flow is life has highs, it has lows ebbs and flows. And you have to be prepared for that. You have to build your resilience for that. You have to be kind to yourself for that. Yeah. I don't know. It provides me comfort when I hear somebody as amazing a lady as that say, yes, it is ups and downs, I guess. It's just she's in my hole. And I like it for that.

Al
That's going to be the clip that I got to use the beginning of the episode.

Leanne
She's in my hole.

Al
Not that whole okay, guys, if you're interested in learning more about Julienne, then I will link to her.

Leanne
You can't put that out. Contact.

Al
If you're interested in learning more about Juliet and her book, then look in the show notes. There will be some links there. You can see how she can do it, how you can get involved in the coaching, how you can buy a book. Although if I understand it is on Amazon, which I think everyone has to use Amazon these days because Borders has gone and Barnes and Noble looks like Borders.

Leanne
I used to love Borders, many inherent there.

Al
Did you buy anything from them, though?

No.

Al
Okay, so we'll call it a day. We have got a potential guest, one of my favourite titles of a book. She's a lady who's written a book. She's a comedian and she went to Bali and her book is called Eat, Pray, Love My Ass. And it's all about her bullshit times in Bali.

Leanne
I like Carol already.

Al
You will love her. I met at a comedy event, I think when my friend is doing an event, doing a stand up there. Anyway, so we're looking forward to that. It's hopefully happening this week, so it will be ready for you in well, let me see. We're going in the future now, about ten days time. So by a week on Friday you'll have it. Hopefully. If not, then we'll just unfriendly have to put up with us.

Leanne
But the good thing is if you're catching up the service, it's already there.

Al
Yeah, good point.

Leanne
Can you just binge the next one right away?

Al
Good point. Right. Should we call it a day and go and get a gym?

Leanne
Yes.

Al
Okay, bye for now.

Leanne
Bye. You.

Leave a comment